Look honestly at your responses

Face where you fell short and where you acted well, without spiraling into either.

Why it works

Reviewing your own choices from the earlier gratitude-grounded stance allows honest self-examination without the defensiveness that triggers either denial or shame spirals. Acknowledging both shortfalls and good responses keeps the self-image accurate, which is the precondition for actually changing rather than just feeling bad.

How to do it

1. Name plainly where you acted against your values today, without dramatizing it.
2. Also name where you responded well, so the review stays balanced.
3. Hold both with self-compassion — honest, but not punishing.

Evidence

Balancing honest self-appraisal with self-compassion is consistent with self-compassion research, which finds it supports accountability without the paralysis of harsh self-criticism; the Examen step itself is a contemplative discipline. (mechanistic)

The self-compassion link is well-supported in its own literature; applying it to the Examen is reasonable extrapolation rather than direct study of this practice.

Common mistake

Turning the step into a guilt session, cataloguing only failures. Honest examination includes what you did well, and is done with compassion, or it just breeds shame.